How to Handle Separation Anxiety in Preschoolers

Everybody has experienced the morning drop-off. When your youngster is giggling in the backseat of the car, you may be thinking, “This morning is great; I’m sure everything will be fine when we get there!” …Just to experience that heartbreaking moment when you have to say goodbye: your child’s brilliant eyes flood with tears, and their lip starts to tremble. You continue to grin, but you can’t help but feel guilty as you walk away, telling yourself that once you’re gone, he or she won’t care.

We have established routines and everyone has gotten back into the swing of our fall schedules now that the first month of school has passed. The morning drop-off, though, is the portion that everyone finds most difficult to adjust to.

How can parents ease this transition, especially if their kids are new to school or students?

FAQs on Separation Anxiety

Separation anxiety, or more precisely “separation fears,” starts to develop as early as 9 months of age and is a natural and crucial part of psychological growth. A kid begins to acquire the cognitive skill of object permanence at this age, which allows them to understand that an object still exists even if they cannot see it or hear it (think of peek-a-boo). Although these worries are common, that does not make them any less difficult to deal with. Between the ages of 12 and 24 months, many children experience their greatest level of separation anxiety. The bright side is that most kids are able to make the change regularly by the time they are 3 years old without experiencing too much misery as they grow more self-assured.

*When to seek professional advice: According to the DSM-V, the manual of psychiatric illnesses, separation anxiety calls for medical advice when it causes feelings of fear or anxiety over being separated from attachment figures to an extent that is unsuitable for a child’s stage of development. This comprises strong unwillingness to be apart from the attachment figure, nightmares, and physical signs of discomfort. It also includes continuous dread or anxiety that the attachment figure may be hurt during the separation.

What You Can Do for Your Child

  • Recognize the Warning Signs: Children find it harder to separate when they are weak, hungry, or weary.
  • Prepare the Environment: Jumpin’ Jax’s prepared environment principle saves the day repeatedly! The secret to successfully reducing your child’s separation anxiety is preparation. While remaining strong and persistent, be understanding of his or her anxiety. This maxim should also be known in your school. You can count on your kid to cease weeping, and typically very soon. At HMS, we are aware of how challenging the morning adjustment can be for parents. Any parent who needs it can get advice from our teachers. The crucial actions taken by HMS to prepare the classroom for our students’ transition in the morning include:
  • To assist you and your kid feel at ease in the classroom and to allow time for your goodbye ritual, we invite our parents to arrive a few minutes before the start of class.
  • https://www.paramusdaycare.com/ facilitates the adjustment by planning morning activities to shift focus away from the emotional transition, which has the added advantage of becoming a regular part of the day. Your youngster will eventually be eager to enter the school and engage in the morning’s unique activities.
  • To allay your worries as well, we take monthly pictures of your youngster enjoying each day at school while you’re away.
  • Especially when your child is just starting school, our kind and experienced teachers and directors are taught to use a specific protocol if your child is having difficulties. You are in capable hands!
  • Get Them Used to the Routine: To avoid the warning signals and build a ready atmosphere, it is crucial to establish a daily routine. Consistent morning routines fight against hungry kids, and consistent nighttime rituals fight against a tired and irritable toddler. Need assistance creating your routine? Refer to our example routine as a roadmap for future achievement! Trust between you and your child is developed through a regular schedule. Remember to be the one to pick up your children if you say you will in order to gain their trust. Tell them you’ll be back after a fantastic day at school so they know what to anticipate. Your youngster gains more self-assurance in the morning when they realize they can count on you to show there when you say you will. Over time, the youngster learns to expect the routine, which reduces separation tantrums until they are nonexistent. Last but not least, adopt an optimistic outlook every day to set the tone for the day. Also, whenever a child achieves a goal, praise them and tell them they are doing a fantastic job!
  • Shorten Your Transition: Successful transitions happen quickly; lengthy ones make it more difficult to let go (literally). To ensure a happy goodbye, offer your youngster your undivided attention during the changeover. Try not to leave quietly without saying goodbye because doing so would be a betrayal of your child’s trust. Once you’ve spoken your goodbyes, go right away. If you are not planning to stay for the remainder of the day or a special event, do not enter the classroom again. Reentering fosters a false sense of hope that you will arrive soon, conditioning the youngster to believe that you will arrive earlier than expected. This may cause more intense emotional outbursts when you finally depart.
  • Maintain Your Positive Attitude (You’re Doing Fine!) : Children can sense your nervousness, so when parents are secure and at ease with the routine, the child feels safe and learns that same confidence. According to one study, children’s separation anxiety at the time of transition was positively connected with separation anxiety in mothers. The anxiety symptoms that children will experience during the transition were predicted by mothers’ anxieties of separation. The results showed that the morning transition is the best time to pretend to be someone you’re not.

*Advice for working parents: Establish a particular morning parting routine with your child, such as a special handshake or hug. Keep your ritual brief and simple, and don’t stop performing it! This can help you move more easily into the morning and enhance your relationship.

Do a few practice runs so that you and your child can get used to being apart before starting preschool if you have previously stayed at home with your child and are doing so for the first time. Plan play dates at Grandma’s house or take advantage of this opportunity to rekindle your relationship with your partner by planning a date night! Start with little intervals of time and work your way up to longer ones. This strategy aids in creating a ready emotional and mental environment so that your child can get used to being away from you and the experience of attending school.